Which Comes First: Expansion or Healing?

Have you ever felt so stuck and the hardest part was that it felt like it was never going to change?

I'm remembering a time when I first went to college, and felt myself pulling an invisible veil over my whole being, energetically.

Dimming my energy allowed me to avoid being seen and fade into the background.

But it hurt being stuck...I was like a beautiful butterfly that had somehow landed herself ina a bowl of honey, and could not get out.

Many times when my clients come to me, they also feel like that butterfly---they know they have so much potential, buth they just can't seem to get out of the honey, which usually means they have not (on their own) been able to break through to their next level of income, leadership, well being and financial stability.

If you are feeling like a butterfly stuck in honey, there is a solution and that is healing.

Let's play with the butterfly in honey analogy some more....if a butterfly really was stuck in honey, which would she need first: healing or expansion?

Play with me....

If we tried to help her expand first, we would sit down with her and give her expansion exercise after expansion exercise, until she could see and feel her future with perfect clarity.

She could see herself flying through the sky, sipping on flower nectar when hungry, enjoying the breeze pulling her along.

She would have the right "mindset" to fly.

But without healing, her wings are still covered with a sticky substance that disallows flying. She hasn't healed her wings, let alone her mental malady that causes her to continually fly into the stickiest, most debilitating substances.

BUT... if we do the healing first: pull her wings gently out of the honey,  clean them off, add healing substances to bring back their strength and magical shine, then physical exercises to make sure she flies with grace and direction.

THEN... we keep doing the healing work. We show her how she has been drawn to the very matter that will inevitably kill her: honey.  We give her so  much practice landing safely, with guidance, on plants, trees, rocks, flowers, but never again on honey.

We champion her, we tell her she has what it takes to fly wherever she wants. We remind her she knows the right places to land: she’s got this!

THEN… she’s ready to fly.

And as she truly begins to fly well then, she can receive help expanding.

We can help her see ALL the places she will now be able to fly to. We can open her up to all  the experiences that she now has within reach. She can see with crystal clarity exactly where she is going, without anything holding her back.

When I think back to my 19 year old self, a butterfly stuck in honey, if there was anything I would share with her it would be to start the healing journey NOW.

Many times in my healing journey I’ve wanted to expand. In particular with money....each coach I’ve worked with, I’ve immediately asked: please help me expand to my next financial level.

Expansion work is super powerful, and can be very effective, and as humans determined to live our best lives, we are often drawn to the expansion first, but….healing has to come first.

Another great prescription is alternating between the two: heal, expand, heal expand.

But healing definitely needs to be prioritized.

Your mindset is nothing but a beautiful, shiny dream  until you heal what is hurting inside you, which unlocks your inner power and confidence, allowing you to go to the places you’ve been dreaming of for so long.

As I embody higher and higher levels of mastery as a money mindset coach, I always know exactly what is needed for each client, at that particular time.

If you know you have a lot more potential than what is being manifested in your life, consider healing what is buried inside.

In my coaching practice, I see many different kinds of money pain that need healing. See if any of these relate to you at all.

Money Traumas:

  • You were given a lot of money, but love was withheld
  • A parent with wealth abandoned you, causing you to associate money with abandonment
  • There was always a feeling of "not enough money" growing up, causing you to feel "not enough" inside
  • You were brainwashed to believe that money was for men to handle, not women, leaving you unable to access your inner drive
  • Money was used to manipulate or abuse you
  • There were favorites in your family who received more financial abundance than you did
  • You were given financial abundance with the quiet understanding that you were to remain silent about the abuse you were surviving
  • You were made fun of publicly for not having the things money could buy
  • You were taught that there was not enough money for everyone and that wanting money was selfish, leaving you with the inability to accept larger sums of money
  • Your ex spouse tried to keep you in the marriage by telling you that you would never be able to earn well, leaving you feeling incapable after the divorce
  • As a child, you were the grown up in the family, paying the bills and watching the money, and now you don’t want anything to do with money

If you recognize yourself in any of these descriptions, it’s time for you to pull your wings out of the honey.

And when you take the time to dive into your darkness, and heal all aspects of yourself, you will be free to fly wherever you desire.

Much love,

September 8, 2021

Contact me if you’d like some tips on how you can improve your relationship with Money.